Until Focused
by CallmeLupe
Summary: A girl who loves to lie, especially to herself, finds someone so observant, who notices you day after day. Someone who says they know you, but yet you couldn't possibly want anything to do with them. You can't avoid this fate, not even if you run away


She never knew what was going to come next. Was she going to remain happy? Or would someone ruin that amazing feeling of peace with their own selfishness? How could she possibly remain sane with the roller-coaster life she lived? One thing was for sure, if she was happy there was something bad coming ahead. Even if it was minor, there was always something. It's unpreventable. If you're at a point in your life where everything seems in it's place, perfect almost, life must destroy it. There's no such thing as perfection. That's why you must never think you've achieved it, that would only mean a mistake on your part. She learned slowly but in the end she did recognize what honesty meant. Here it goes. Her life, in chapters.

She slowly rose out of bed, her body aching. She soon felt the massive headache that was a repercussion of last night's events. The quick and loud ringing in her ears seemed to grow heavier as she tried to maintain a clear view of the easiest thing in front of her. A painting created by her father. She knew when to stand up if the image was coming into focus. She would never dare examine that painting. She only hung it up that very night that she first drank. Soon, she found it to be useful for every hangover she got. She laughed at the thought that she will never have to know what that painting held because of her hobbies. Drinking, smoking, partying, and boys. Yes boys as a hobby. Imagine that. She laughed again hoping for the day to be better than the past ones. Her mind quickly fluttered back and forth to what she did last night, but she couldn't remember a thing so she chose to forget about it.

She felt something stuck in her throat and ran to the bathroom, vomiting into the toilet. She washed away the evidence and walked into the kitchen to find her little sister attempting to make pancakes. To be honest, she wasn't as fond as she could be about her sibling, Emily Yenners. Short brown hair. Looked old for her age. As tiny as a thumbtack and as skinny as a toothpick. They were never too close, after all she couldn't take an 8 year old to where she hung out. Obviously, it would be too inappropriate, and as much as she didn't know her little sister, she wouldn't dare put her on the path to her own life.

A life known to be bipolar.

She rolled her eyes and grabbed the pan from her sister's hands. Just in time too, because it was turning a dark brown. She served her little sister the breakfast and took a glass of milk. The awkward silence at the table was nothing new.

"One of these days you're gonna burn yourself." That was a statement entirely to adult-like to be telling an 8 year old. She didn't care, it was the truth. She might as well warn her about what might happen.

"It was 2 o'clock, Lexi." She protested using Alex's nickname wisely, since she hated being called Alex. "I was hungry and my mom's working." Of course she said _my_ mom, being possessive at all times. She knew Lexi hated anything having to do with family, but the sad part was that Emily was only 8. Lexi hated having anything to do with her mother including that she was her child. She would ignore her mother at all times, clean only _her_ room, make her own food, go to work, and go to bed whenever she wished. That's mainly what her day consisted of. Oh, wait. She'd go to parties whenever she desired not bothering to tell her mother. Asking her for permission was out of the question. She was almost 18 anyway, and there was no question if she was excited for her birthday in November to move out. Not that she would, she didn't have the money, but the fact that she could leave at any moment's notice felt life-altering.

"Well next time, serve yourself some cereal. Don't touch the stove I don't want to have to wake up to smoke." Lexi replied, clearly annoyed.

"Shouldn't you be used to it?" The question was too high-pitched to not be innocent. Emily had caught Lexi several times. Whether, it was on the stoop or even inside, and she, quite frankly, didn't care if she was caught. She had to take out a cigarette every now and then, life was life. She didn't like dealing with it unless she had some sort of substance to keep herself calm. Emily was always the only one that was home to be exposed to it. Lexi didn't like the comment even if it did sound innocent. She pretended that she didn't hear her little sister and rushed to get out of the house. She saw the time, and her eyes opened wide. She was an hour late for work. She had taken a summer job to support herself. She's had the same one for 2 years straight, since she was 16. Her mom had done something right for once and convinced her friend, the owner of the restaurant to let her waitress there.

She ran, one foot behind the other as fast as she could. When she reached the shop, she cautiously opened the door afraid of being scolded. The chimes hung above the door and rang just a little with the slight breeze that entered. The place was empty, but soon would be filled with chatter since it was almost lunch time. Thankfully, the owner didn't even notice.

"In fact, I forgot to tell you. Since it's been so busy around here I got a new waiter." She smiled, ringing something up from the counter looking at the new guy.

Lexi followed her gaze as she walked behind the counter to get her clothes. She had a deal with Paula, the restaurant owner, that she would change when her shift started. She didn't want to wear the overly dressy clothes to some park with her "friends." Nope, she didn't care what they thought. They were simply too uncomfortable. Soon, she noticed the tall boy who actually was sort of attractive, but not her type at all. Not that she cared, she was too busy hooking up with them that she had no time for relationships. He had pitch black hair that fell over his forehead and his eyes always seemed to smile.


End file.
